So my wife is at the 38 week stage of her first pregnancy and I’m about to fulfil one of my personal dreams – I’m going to start up my own family and be a father. And I can’t wait! This baby can come anytime between now and February 13th. *bites fingernails in anticipation*
Over 30 weeks ago, I found out that my wife was pregnant. To tell the truth, I have no shame in saying that I didn’t have that cliché feeling of being happy and over the moon. I was scared, anxious and full of panic wondering if my wife actually was pregnant (it was a surprise as we weren’t intentionally trying) and if I was personally ready for all this responsibility. I definitely didn’t feel ready. But after a few weeks, I came round to the reality of this little miracle and decided that I have to be ready. It’s what I’ve always wanted.
Fast forward to the past week and “Daddy Kam” has been proactive in getting together as much free baby gifts and clothes as possible (with wonderful results), putting up the new cot (with my wife’s help) and buggy, looking after my heavily pregnant wife, and getting the birthing plan/hospital bag packed and finalised.
I have even got together a small solid support team of friends and family called #TeamAssadi who will be the first to see the baby when it arrives in this world. They have been prepped with the codeword of when my wife goes into labour as well as where the hospital is too.
Nearly 12 years ago, my mother passed away and although she won’t be here to see her grandchild, I know she would have been proud and happy for me.
A lot of my personal childhood memories and things are kept at my aunt’s house (who took me in at age 16 when Mum passed away) and yesterday I went to clear them out, sorting out what to keep/throw away. Going through these things brought up some beautiful memories. I found cards/drawings to my mum from me, her wedding photos, my school reports, my childhood books and teddy bears as well as cards/love letters/photos received from some of my past dalliances. I had a laugh but I also had an internal cry – this process proved very therapeutic for me.
It made me realise that I will be part of creating these sorts of memories for my child, I’m so grateful for that chance. I thought a lot about my mum yesterday and how much I truly miss her. If I can be half the parent that was, then I should do well.
At the moment, I’m keeping my head focused on myself and on my wife in terms of being the best birthing partner that I can be to her as well as helping her cope with the mammoth task of giving birth and coming to terms with everything that’s involved within that!
Wish me luck!