In life, things can seem to be going well and easy with everything going good and in your stride. You’re thankful, you appreciate life, you thank God even more than usual for the blessings you’ve been bestowed. However, I believe that God has a way of keeping us grounded by bringing us down to earth and allowing us to remember who is in control and that not everything in life is fine and dandy.
Recently, I’ve been secretly dealing with some difficult news with family and friends and also some challenges in life too. I’ve had to deal with new dynamics with people and new situations that I’m not used to but I knew was probably going to eventually come sooner or later. My patience has been tested. My positivity has been tested. I’ve been thrown off. My mind was unfocused and askew. It’s been hard but I’ve persevered and got through it all by just being smart, organized and honest to myself without offending anyone too badly or ruffling feathers. I don’t like to tell my business to everyone. Sometimes I like to deal with things privately and get very territorial about what I’m dealing with. Other than my wife and a couple of close friends, I don’t really confide in anyone unless I really want to and choose to do so. I don’t believe in keeping things pent up inside me. People can be very sensitive in difficult situations like this. The few situations I’ve had to deal with could have made me negative, sad and angry about life and the sour lemons it can throw at us. Luckily I like drinking lemonade so no one is stealing my shine or positive outlook.
So, what does this have to do with fatherhood you may ask? Well, even though I’ve had to deal with these life curveballs – I’ve been able to stay grounded because of my family unit. Other than my wife and her amazing companionship and openness to listen, my daughter Lily has been the breath of fresh air I’ve needed and craved, especially in times like this. And from her, all it takes is a smile or a laugh. A random joke or just another part of her quirky personality and weird British sense of humour. It’s the little things from her that she shows me that are magnified in my mind that make things better. A natural expression of love through her either saying it to me, her giving me a hug or a kiss, or just a knowing look way beyond her years just comforts me to the fullest and brings me a positive glow.
Lily gives me another dimension of love that I never thought I would have or even get to understand. It’s something separate and more unique and innocent, something completely different and needed that I don’t necessarily get from my wife. It’s a different type of love and that’s no offence to my wife, because my wife gives me so much and more that I’m eternally grateful. Seeing Lily’s development, understanding, reasoning and vocabulary progress and advance really grounded me and gives me happiness and purpose in tough times like the ones I’ve touched on today. Lily is also building up intuition to the point where she can actively read me and my feelings. She knows how to adapt to them or just when I need a big hug. I enjoy spending time with her at school when I drop her off or pick her up. I enjoy being the weird cool dad that her friends like because she’s proud of me and enjoys me being her dad and being around. I love being silly with her as well. It doesn’t take a lot for us to embrace the silly with us both!
Lily, thank you for being everything to me and more. And thank you for being the pep talk and counseling session I always need at the right time. Your timing is perfect – I wonder if you even know that.